This is my first blog and I find myself sitting here wondering what I should write about. I’m stressing a little over it, what with it being the first blog and all. Will it set the right tone for future posts? Will it convey a meaningful or inspiring message? Will people read it and, if they do, will they think, “What a weirdo!”? lol. I don’t have any clue why I allow myself to feel so much pressure over such little things! The real reason I’m blogging has little to nothing to do with anyone else. I just find writing to be natural bent for me and a great way to sort out the billions of thoughts that are rambling around in my head at any given moment. So, if you read this and you’re inspired, that’s awesome. If you think I’m a weirdo, that’s cool too…’cause I kind of am. lol. Aren’t we all?!
So, of the billions of rambling thoughts bouncing off the inside of my skull, what I really feel most compelled to share right now is just an amazing appreciation for all the wonderful people and things God has enriched my life with.
I remember being an akward, shy little girl in 7th grade and speaking to no one unless spoken to (which was rare). The change over from elementary school to junior high had a overwhelming, crippling affect on me and I felt like I had not a friend in the world. I was embarassed and ashamed to be me. I found myself focusing my thoughts inwardly and hating who I saw. My eyes were always downcast and my heart felt as if it was screaming out for just one person to notice it and appreciate it. My demeanor was quiet and withdrawn. I’ve never felt so alone in my entire life.
To see how God has changed me, to see the boldness He has instilled in me, to recognize the beauty He built into me and to love who I am and to be proud of where I’ve come from…its more than I ever could have hoped for or imagined. Never did I dream I’d be so close to my parents. I couldn’t have begun to imagine back then that I would have so many friends – not just friends, but real friends…people who are really there for me…people who know my faults and are aware of my deepest, darkest secrets and they love me just as I am. I didn’t give a thought to being placed into a church where the leadership is so real and trustworthy–where God’s Word is boldly spoken and love is freely given. Never did I think that mere words I would speak, through God’s perfect grace, would help people to change their lives and even some to come to Christ. All this from a little girl who despised herself. Someone who tried to avoid people and did her best to stay lost in the crowd, unseen and unnoticed.
Its so amazing to me what God has done with me and what He continues to do with me. Just me. Little ‘ol Lisa…a mere speck in the vastness of this incredible universe and beyond. He not only knows me, but He loves me. He not only wants to give me all I need, but He wants to bless me with all the desires of my heart. He waited patiently on me as I went through my rebellious years. He never gave up on me. He sought me out. He chose me and drew me to Him. And in that moment that I accepted his love and asked him to take control of my life, I changed. I became a new creature in Christ and now…the little girl from junior high is just a memory.
God really does take the most broken down, messed up people and use them to advance His kingdom. I feel so blessed to get to be a part of God’s plans. I pray that He continues to use me to speak into people’s lives on His behalf. I pray that what He has me doing right now is only a stepping stone. I believe God has implanted greatness into all of our hearts and its up to us to walk out the path that He has laid before us and become all He created us to be. God is a great God and I just can’t believe He created us for a life of mediocracy. I truly believe He has great plans for me (and you!) and I fully intend on doing all I can to fufill my calling. Honestly, I don’t have a clue what it is He has planned for me long-term, but I love where He has me and I trust where He’s leading me. I’m excited to see where He takes me from here. 🙂
220 Gal 