Too Busy

I’m missing my best friend. I’ve been neglectful of Him and I feel just awful about it. He’s the One who will always be there when you need Him. He’ll always forgive you, so its easy to make excuses…you’re just too busy with life to spend time with Him. And He just patiently waits, every once in a while, tossing you a little reminder that He’s there, then He waits some more. Why does He continue to operate in this obviously lop-sided relationship? Because He loves us so much and He has more faith in us than we do in ourselves.

I feel so bad; like a user or a fair-weather friend – or, rather, a stormy weather friend. Oh I’m on the horn with Him immediately when I have a need. I hate that He has to get my attention that way. I should spend time with my God every day – good, quality time – just because of who He is. He’s given everything He has to me and I just boldly walk around, using His resources and taking the things He has blessed me with and I fail to remember Him and give Him the glory for it all. I can do nothing on my own. I need Him and He gives Himself so freely, then I just run off, like a ungrateful child. All He wants is a little of my time, but I’m too busy.

My God. I am so sorry. I miss the closeness we’ve shared. I miss the feeling of your arms enveloping me and protecting me, loving me, comforting me. I miss the closeness, knowing when I speak, you’re attentively listening to me. And I miss all these things not because you’ve gone anywhere, but because I have. So I humbly throw myself at your feet once again, a repentant self-absorbed sinner, and ask your forgiveness. May your Spirit not just dwell within me, but let it consume me, overflowing, until it pours out of every pore in my body. Open my ears that I may once again clearly hear your loving, tender voice. Fill my mouth with songs of praise and thanksgiving. Soften my heart to forgive and to love more fully than ever before. Help me to see others through your eyes and give me a servant’s heart. And never, ever, allow me to take any credit for the wonderful things that you’re doing through me, in me, and for me. There is none other like You and words will never be enough to express the love I have for You and the gratitude I have for all You have done.

Thank you for healing my marriage and helping me to find the right venue to use the brokenness as a platform to help others. Thank you for the pastors and mentors you have placed in my path to help me along the way. Thank you for the family and friends you have so richly blessed me with. Thank you, Lord, for moving in my finances and in my career. Thank you for giving me a vision for the future. Thank you for giving me strong people to help guide me and broken people that I can help find their way to You. Thank you for instructing me and guiding me every day, even when I fail to listen. Thank you for your loving discipline and for even the ugly stuff that has happened in this life, that it has helped me to see the goodness and beauty that lies in You. And thank You, God, for coming the minute I called and restoring the closeness to You that I was so desperately missing just moments ago. You are so good! 🙂