I had to write all this down because God has been doing so much for me that I’m about to come unglued with excitement! I have never been in this crazy-beautiful place that I am right now with God. There’s too much for me to try to explain and, much of it, I can’t explain. It’s a feeling…like elation…with butterflies in my stomach…like being in love! I can actually FEEL God loving me.
I started teaching a new round of After His Heart classes last week (the women’s ministry I’m involved in). After a week of Satan attacking me and my students, I had a particularly troublesome issue come up just before class started – so, I prayed about it, completely releasing the issue to Him. I’ve never been able to let go of something this big so completely and with such ease as I did right then, but, seeing the trickery of Satan at play here, it was with total trust that I laid the issue at God’s feet and turned my back on it. And, now, I can honestly say, I am not bothered by it at all.
Since that time, I feel like I’ve been put on one of those “electric sidewalks,” like they have in the airport…where you move at warp speed with half the effort. I’ve been getting breakthrough after breakthrough. Then, God showed me how that moment of trust and obedience caused me to begin opening up – kind of like a flower – and He is expanding my petals and causing me to bloom. God showed me this flower-metaphor this afternoon. Shortly after that, I read someone’s Facebook post and he asked, “What is God saying to you right now?” Immediately, I got in my spirit, “I’m not finished yet.”
WOW!!!! (said like my pastor – if you know him, you’ll get it!)
So, hungry for more, I had to know what the Bible says about flowers. Oh my goodness. It was even more amazing. The “rose of Sharon” that’s referred to in the second chapter of the Song of Solomon jumped off the page at me. I have NEVER been able really relate the Song of Solomon to God and me. It was just kind of creepy, I guess, with all the sexual references in that book! But this time…it said something completely different:
I am a rose of Sharon, a lily of the valleys. Like a lily among thorns is my darling among the maidens. Like an apple tree among the trees of the forest is my lover among the young men. I delight to sit in his shade, and his fruit is sweet to my taste. He has taken me to the banquet hall, and his banner over me is love. Strengthen me with raisins, refresh me with apples, for I am faint with love. His left arm is under my head, and his right arm embraces me. Daughters of Jerusalem, I charge you by the gazelles and by the does of the field: Do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires. Listen! My lover! Look! Here he comes, leaping across the mountains, bounding over the hills. My lover is like a gazelle or a young stag. Look! There he stands behind our wall, gazing through the windows, peering through the lattice.
My lover spoke and said to me, “Arise, my darling, my beautiful one, and come with me. See! The winter is past; the rains are over and gone. Flowers appear on the earth; the season of singing has come, the cooing of doves is heard in our land. The fig tree forms its early fruit; the blossoming vines spread their fragrance. Arise, come, my darling; my beautiful one, come with me.”
Here’s how I interpret those verses:
I am a rose (because He just showed me that I’m a flower blooming). He sees beauty in me that is somehow excellent – above the norm. I sit in His shade (trust) and his fruit is sweet to my taste (His Word, His Presence, His Goodness and Mercy). He holds up my head (gives me strength and confidence) and his other hand wraps around my waist (an embrace, simultaneously supporting and loving me). He comes, leaping across mountains and bounding over hills, like a hero, coming just for ME. He tells me to come with Him. Winter (our recent “separation”/lack of closeness) is OVER. Flowers appear (beauty), singing comes (joy), and cooing can be heard in the land (peace). Arise and come with me (We’re going somewhere!!!).
These totally amazing “ah-ha!” moments don’t happen often, but when they do…I just feel like I want to scream from the mountaintops! I want to jump up and down and giggle like a school-girl! I want to somehow figure out how to express what just happened in my life and there are quite simply no words!
This blog is for me. I don’t ever want to forget how this feels. I want to capture as much of it as I can so I can look at it again later and revel in it all over again. I feel like the most loved girl in the world! 🙂
220 Gal 