The Fog

I looked outside this week and the ground was covered in a thick, white fog. That sight immediately took me back in time to when I was just a little girl. Oh, how I loved those fog-filled mornings! I played adventurous games in my head through the cloud-covered streets on my way to the bus stop. I was usually a spy; most often, I was Agent 99 (yes, from Get Smart…because I always thought she was so pretty).

I would pull my collar up around my neck and tuck my chin inside my jacket to help hide my face. Then I would glance, ever-so-slyly, out of the corners of my eyes, watching the imaginary bad guys and double-agents in my peripheral vision as they tried to hide themselves from me (fools…they had no idea I knew they were there). My school books—the ones that contained the envelope full of government secrets—were securely tucked in my arms and held close to my body. I carefully approached corners, pausing briefly to listen for the tell-tale footfalls of my would-be adversaries. I proceed around the corner only after striking my best “Charlie’s Angels” pose and carefully peering around the edges of nearby cars and houses, ensuring I would not be taken by surprise. Yeah. I was kind of a dork. But I had a GREAT imagination. lol.

I caught myself smiling at the fog (and laughing at myself!) as these memories fleeted through my head. I’ve always been one to love a good adventure. That is…until recently. You know, as you get older, you really start to embrace the same ‘ol same ‘ol. Hum-drum begins to sound like a good thing. You enjoy a good old-fashioned routine. Eating the same thing for breakfast, taking the same route to work, and parking in the same spot every day gives you some kind of weirded out comfort. You lose your sense of adventure and replace it with grown-up, responsible, practical routines.

I’ve recently been given some huge plans from God and he just keeps reaffirming them through different people. I’m talking about some pretty big stuff here – big to me anyway. And it all sounds so exciting…as long as it stays in the future. The thought of changing things right now to attain those goals is actually pretty scary and totally out of my comfort zone. I mean, if God would just zap it all into existence, that would be totally cool…but, that’s not usually how He rolls. There’s all this growing and pruning and un-fun stuff that usually precedes the good stuff. And, what’s more, the things He’s calling me to do, I’ve never done before. I have no frame of reference. I don’t know that I really know how to do it. I don’t know anyone who has done it that I can talk to. So I’m just out there, me and God.

I’m in the fog. It’s dense and, quite frankly, it’s a little scary—not as fun as it was when I was a kid. I mean, you don’t know what’s lurking outside of the two-foot radius that you can see around you…and my real adversary IS out there, like a stealthy lion, stalking his prey. I don’t have to be afraid of him, but I dare not underestimate him either.

Due to the intense covering, I can’t see my destination on the horizon, and, sometimes, I can’t really see God either; so I cry out to Him and He responds, letting me know He’s just ahead of me, preparing my path. I realize its a good thing I’m unable to clearly see my destination; as it turns out, my destination and God’s destination are quite different. So being unable to see where I’m going is actually God’s protection; it keeps me from being tempted to go on ahead of Him.

So God and I, we’re on this adventure in the fog. Its scary but its also incredibly exciting. God has created each of us for such an adventure. There’s something big in your heart that He has planted in you. Are you willing to wander through the fog with nothing but God’s voice to guide you? Are you willing to go where He’s leading instead of telling Him where you’re going? Are you holding the “secret plans” God has for you close to your heart and going full-steam into a place you’ve never been? I am. Yep, I am. Afraid and all.